Tuesday, December 7, 2010

YOU Are Beautiful

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(Katy Perry as the iconic Jessica Rabbit via nydailynews.com)

Last week I mentioned to my Facebook friends that:

"good looks" is a relative term. good looks are like ice cream flavors, just because most people want to eat you doesn't mean you're the richest flavor. that's why I never say NO to an ice cream sample ;-)

The subtext is an oldie but a goody basically: "Don't Judge a book by it's cover."

I had a friend tell me once many years ago "Adrian why do you talk to ugly guys when they come up to you at a bar?" The answer is easy, because they are human. Just because I may not be physically attracted to someone doesn't mean I can't have a nice conversation with them, right?

Judging a person's physical beauty is tricky. Judging your own physical beauty, or accepting other's judgment is just as tricky. I've read people's comments on my videos and they've said that I look anywhere from Winona Ryder, Heidi Montag, Kathy Griffin, to Steve Buscemi. I can actually see the resemblance between me and Steve Buscemi, we both have huge foreheads and big round eyes. However we're different in the fact that I don't mind being Mister Pink.

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Geography can play a role in how we judge physical beauty. I have a dear friend who is Asian and was recently telling me how because he grew up in the United States he had to deal with not feeling beautiful. There are guys out there who say things like "Sorry I don't date Asians." Although that may be a person's preference, like saying "I don't date Blacks," it can really cut deep when you're young and trying to find yourself. It can make you feel less desirable over something you simply can't change about yourself. Granted, if my friend was in some other country he could easily have anyone he wants since he is tall, fit, and has the most wonderful skin I've ever felt. He is really beautiful.

Similarly I've heard it said and I've read it in many places where some gay guys say things like "I hate effeminate guys who wear makeup and dress like girls." As if males can only be attractive by displaying masculine traits

That reminds me, I remember boys making fun of me in school because all the other boys had hair on their legs by the age of 13 and I was unable to grow leg hairs until much later in life. Flash forward to when I turned 18 and I won "Best Legs" during my High School Drag Beauty Pageant, as well as winning the crown. Life is funny that way.

I guess my point is, lets not take outer beauty too seriously, including your own. Because as they say "Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder." If someone tells you you look good, always answer with "Thank You." If they say you look tired, it's their polite way of saying "You look like Shit," to which your answer should always be "Thank you, I'll give you my secrets free of charge if you'd like to achieve this look."



Inner Beauty is a whole other subject isn't it? Inner beauty comes from a person's actions. And that is why I'm in love with what Gabriela Badilla did. She transformed a person's attempt of achieving a state of beauty and turned it into a beautiful life collaboration. There is such beauty in connecting to another human being through emotional expression. That is a level of beauty we should all strive to achieve, don't you think?

I would love for you to text/call/email the words "You are beautiful" to someone in your life. In a time where we are presented with such an ugly picture of the world, it's always nice to remember the beautiful people in our lives and how their actions make life beautiful.

This TED talk regarding Beauty is fascinating.