Thursday, March 10, 2011

Cross Dressing In Austria

Austria
(photo: Austria via)

This week's viewer mail.
Thank you J for writing in and sharing such personal stories.

I have plenty I would love to reply.... as a matter of fact, I will write a few things down and post it tomorrow.
The short version is "Always be true to yourself."
Tomorrow I'll post my opinion and tips on going public with your cross dressing.

thanks again for writing in.

sending you much love.

Enjoy the beautiful email from J, and feel free to leave any advice you might have for him in the comments section.

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Hello Adrian!

You two are my heroes!

My name is J, I am 26 and I live in Austria. I have the urge to cross-dress since I was little, but as society governs, I had to keep this to myself. But, in the last few years, more and more of my cross-dressing came out into public, for events as Halloween or carnival or birthday parties with a masking ball as a theme. It went pretty well, and I had a lot of positive feedback on my looks (I won first prize in the women category on the masking ball =D). So, after seeing your show and your website, it encouraged me to do more for me, and the urge to go public got stronger. So I asked a girlfriend of mine to help me shopping, and I spent the whole day today looking for feminine stuff to wear, and it was so much fun! I even got encouraged by a young saleswoman.

In the evening I wanted to show my older sister (33) the new looks, so she could comment (she is the only one in the family to know about my passion for cross-dressing, and she is OK with it). After talking about the clothes she asked me when I wanted to wear them, and I told her in bright daylight, in public.

And that's when she got really upset, as she didn't want our parents to find out. She told me that she heard my father say, that if he found out that one of his sons is gay*, he would take a revolver and ... I am sorry, I am so sad about this, I cant even write what he would do to himself, but you can imagine it. He is old fashioned, christian, and we immigrated to Austria when I was very little from Croatia (a country which is itself 100 years in the past with it's views, if you know what I mean). I love both my parents, and they love me, and now this love is being tested by my personality, by what I am, by the views of my parents, by the views of society.

I talked again to my sister, and she said that she wanted to prevent my parents of knowing, no matter what. She finds my desire to be open about it very egoistical, and she would rather have it that I do it in hiding.

But as I believe in the truth, and doing something in hiding is a kind of lying, this would be wrong to me. I want to express myself to my friends, to society. I don't really care if my parents get to know it (if it's better for them, I don't want them to know), and I would respect them by not dressing up in front of them, or at family events, but at least I want to be myself with my friends, and in my own free time.

I know that you can't probably help me, but it did good to send this e-mail to someone who understands. Also I wanted to give a little back to someone who inspired me, and I hope that my story helps you or other people ... I don't know.

Know that I will make an appointment tomorrow at a professional LGBT counseling with me and my sister, so that I can find a way out of this situation, without hurting anyone.

If you want I can keep you updated on what is happening.

I wish you all the best and hope that you contine your important work as long as you can

J

*I don't believe in defining gender roles or sexual preferences (my list would be very long, as I like so much), I can't say if I am gay or not. I haven't had anything with a man ... yet. Life is full of suprises, and who knows what the future will bring