Monday, June 20, 2011

Emotional Immaturity, GROW UP

diaperman

I was in a relationship many many years ago where the guy I was with lost his shit simply because I told him I didn't like a song he was in LOVE with.

"WHAT???!!!! HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE IT?" he screamed

"I just don't like it." I said calmly

Then he unleashed World War III on my ass! He tried to convince me that whatever song he was playing, I think it might have been an Andrew Lloyd Webber song, was the best song ever written! I simply HAD TO LIKE IT BECAUSE HE LOVED IT!

"Nope sorry, I don't like it."

He huffed and puffed and didn't speak to me for the rest of the evening, giving me the cold shoulder.

Clearly we were on two separate pages. Looking back I know that what he really wanted from me was to acknowledge that the song was special to him. Thus he demanded that I show respect by saying something like "I see why you like this song." But I didn't say that because that wasn't the topic at hand. The topic was "the song" he asked me what I thought about the SONG. The topic was NOT "how I felt about his feelings towards the song."

Don't ask for someone's honest opinion in regards to something that is special to you if you can not handle that person's honesty.

If you ask me if those jeans make your fat ass look fat, I'll probably say, "those jeans don't make your ass look fat. Your ass makes your ass look fat." Period. Case closed on honesty. You want sugar coating then go to Dairy Queen.

Back to the song topic. People get so worked up because other's "taste" is different than theirs. They take it as a personal attack.

"I don't like vanilla"

"WHAT???!!! YOU DON'T LIKE VANILLA??? EVERYONE LIKES VANILLA"

Instead of being outraged that someone doesn't share your same taste, express why you like what you like and then ask them what they like. You may not always be on the same page but it doesn't mean you're not reading the same book ;-)