Who Loves You More Than Me, Myself, and I?
"Do you always talk to yourself?" is a common question I hear people ask me when they, well...catch me talking to myself. I usually tell them that I can spend hours talking to myself. "I'm my own best friend," I say with a smirk on my face. That's the perk of having an alter-ego, you are never alone.
I know I'm not alone on this one, I bet you've found yourself at the grocery store making some tough life decision, "should I get the healthy cereal or should I get the chocolate one that is packed with sugar?" Then suddenly it's as if you hear an inner voice that tells you "get the chocolate one, it's more fun!"
I don't think it's strange one bit to vocalize those inner voices, heck, you can even go one step further and give them names. I find it important to identify who is speaking to you but most importantly HOW are YOU being spoken to...by YOU. You spend more time with yourself than anyone else on this Earth, so naturally the relationship you have with yourself, by default, should be the most important one.
What you think of yourself often times dictates how you speak to yourself, and how you speak to yourself can either empower you or it can bring you down. How many times have we said the wrong thing, or accidentally broken something, or made the wrong turn and in a split second the words "stupid me" come out of your mouth? It's more common than you think. It might seem inconsequential but in that very moment you have missed the opportunity to forgive yourself. You've missed the opportunity to encourage yourself to keep learning - ya know, since any mistake big or small is a learning experience.
If the phrase "stupid me" comes out of your mouth don't treat it as if they are words YOU have said but as if someone else has said them to YOU. Then stop yourself and say, "hey there, we all make mistakes, I'm only human."
Stand up for yourself, TO yourself.
Often times I get emails from male crossdressers around the world who tell me that their alter-egos, their femme self, is driving them nuts because she keeps trying to come out more and more often. This is very common. I think it's important to establish a relationship with that voice. See where it takes you. It's important to establish a good relationship with her because she's going to be with you for a long time. There's no point in fighting over the same body, you can both have your turn taking it out for a spin, some times in combat boots, and some times in stilettos.
The main point is to treat yourself with respect, pamper yourself when possible, encourage yourself to do better, and forgive yourself, ESPECIALLY, in moments when Life becomes overwhelming. Most importantly, remember that you are never alone. If you find yourself lost, just stop and ask that voice inside what would she do? You might be pleasantly surprised to find yourself answering yourself in a kind and loving manner.