Friday, June 2, 2017

Transitioning, It Takes a Village.

This mop is getting long. The goal is for it to get twice this long. 
All I have to do is let nature do its thing. Go nature go!

  I hadn't seen my best friend in months since he moved to North Carolina. As soon as he walked through the door of my Brooklyn apartment and saw that I had pierced my ears he said something along the lines of "oh, it's weird seeing you with earings." I must make clear that one of the reasons he is my best friend is because he says exactly what he feels, and he never candy coats anything. I love him for that.

​ Later that day he pointed out how long my nails were "for a guy." He was right. My nails these days are long for a "guy." I even put a coat of shiny nail polish on them. I love them. And I take great pride in how hard it is to keep them looking nice, long, and shiny because without-fail I am forever chipping a nail.

Later that day as we strolled through the streets of New York City, after a delicious sushi dinner, he asked me what's "going on" with me. I knew what he was asking. In a way he was asking if I was transitioning from a man into a woman. I explained. I'm one of those non-binary genderfluid individuals so I felt I had to explain the "transition" I am going through. Yes, I am getting painful electrolysis treatments on my face to permanantly remove my facial hair. Yes, I am growing my hair long on my head. Yes, there is a probability that I may start taking hormones in the future. So naturally the folks who see me on a daily bases are starting to notice the physical changes.

​ As we're walking towards the Subway I tell my friend that I've held back from telling folks about what I'm going through because, frankly, I'm still ME and will still be ME. Sure, my exterior aperance may seem a little different but the person they know is still the same. I don't care about pronouns.  You can call me HE, SHE, THEY, THEM, whatever. So in that regards I don't expect nor request any different treatment from my loved ones.

The most beautiful thing that sticks out in my mind is when my friend softly said to me something along the lines of "be patiant with me, since as you transition this is somewhat of a transition for me." That statement ment the world to me and it reenforced the reason he's my best friend. My future appearane and transformation will be something that he will have to get used to.  I get it. And that's why I don't mind him stating how he feels about my appearance in the interm. He means well. He's just not used to his male friend looking the way he does.

​ My nails are long and shiny. My facial hair is disapearing one follicle at a time. My hair on my head is getting longer by the minute. Little by little I'm starting to look and feel more like myself. I may not talk about it in length with the people I see on a daily bases but then again, some things are best left unsaid. Sometimes all we have to do is show up and let others witness the changes that are happening in our lives. After all, isn't LIFE itself a transitionional period.