The Sexy Funny Privilege

We are currently living in a time where the Black Lives Matter movement is teaching folks about their White Privilege.

My last names are LOPEZ ACOSTA.  Yes I am an immigrant hispanic who was brought to the USA by my parents.  I'm also a Hispanic with very very pale skin. This means at a glance to most people I'm just another white person.

With this idea of "privilege" being tossed around it got me thinking.

Tonight I expressed my thoughts and fillings to my 21 year old Chinese boyfriend.

ME: So I’m working on my book right now and I just read a blog entry from 2014 I wrote on Gender Dysphoria. It needs a little cleaning up but the meat is there. It’s wild to read old stuff. It almost feels like someone else with my same point of view wrote it lol

BOYFRIEND: Hmm. Lol maybe you've changed right. Your point of view?

ME: My point of view so far seems the same as back then. I believe what has changed is my sensitivity and approach to issues such as Gender Dysphoria. I’m starting to realize that when I sit down to write an essay I tap into the most human loving side of myself. I approach a topic thoughtfully and caring with the limited information I have available at the time of writing. It’s like I write from a place where I’m expressing my core beliefs. It reminds me of my English college professor telling me right before I dropped out of college how I had potential as a writer. If only English wasn’t my second language. That’s made it a bit more challenging of course. That’s why I write in plane English I understand academia but it’s not the language I use

BOYFRIEND: I mean in 2014. Since you think you changed your approach?

ME:The short of it is that I’ve always, as far back as I can remember, have had an issue with the oppressive Gender Binary. So I’ve always had this fight for "your right to exist" mentality. But over the years I’ve gained more understanding and empathy for people who are not as assertive as I am.  This gives my approach a bit more empathy I believe. I’m also coming to terms with my privilege of being considered funny and sexy. Let’s face it, life can be easier for people that are considered funny and/or sexy. And that fact actually makes me so sad that I cry. Life is not fair

BOYFRIEND: That's true It really isn't some time

ME: Babe.are you told often that you are funny and sexy?

BOYFRIEND: Occasionally funny. Never sexy

ME: Don’t lie

BOYFRIEND: I mean only by you lol

ME: I tell you you’re sexy all the time


ME: And you make me laugh too

BOYFRIEND: I'm glad I do. I like to think I got the jokes

ME:You are funny AND sexy And lovable And smart

BOYFRIEND: Thank you lol I appreciate it

Privilege, there is more than just "White Privilege." And it affects us all as we navigate through life.  Understanding that someone doesn't experience that privilege is key.  Loving them for who they are is fundamental


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