The Reason I Don't Tell People I'm a Woman
In 1979 I popped out, the doctor looked at my genitals and said "it's a boy." I was socialized as a boy. I lived the life of a boy, teen guy, and then of a young man. Now at 41 years old my sex marker on my driver's license still says MALE but when I walk down the busy New York City streets some people call me miss. Folks now ask me what pronouns they ought to use for me. I look at my genitals and yep, there is still a penis there, maybe a bit bigger than it was back in 1979. It's a boy?
The other day I'm on the phone with my boyfriend when his roommate asks him if he was talking to a guy or a girl. I told him to say yes. lol
A few weeks ago a guy sees me come out of a public MALE restroom, hits on me and says I am a beautiful woman.
Some people in my life use the pronouns she for me and others use the pronoun he for me. I never correct them. They are not mistaken.
So what is the reason I don't tell people I'm a woman? I know some people get all up in arms when they hear someone say "Transwomen are women." I'm not a transwoman. I'm not a cis woman. I'm simply not a woman. It's really that simple.
You may ask do I feel like a woman? I feel like myself. I mean, let's get real here, what does it feel like to be a woman?
Am I a woman trapped in a man's body? Nope.
Do I have a female brain? I don't think so. What does a female brain look like? I mean if there is a difference between a male brain and a female brain I would be ok getting a brain scan and see what sex marker they assign it.
You may ask "but you've been taking hormones since 2018?" That's correct.
Yes, I have a bit of a feminine appearance. Yes, the hormones I've been taking since 2018 have made my body develop small breasts. I have what some may consider to be a feminine expression. If that makes me a woman in your eyes then ok, I'm a woman to you. But I don't need to tell anyone I'm a woman, you know, because I feel that would be disingenuous. I'm ok not being a woman.
As a collective we have divided the world into two sexes, male and female. I know, I get it.
So then does this mean I'm a man? Man, that's a good question. Some people seem to think so. And I'm ok with that as well.
At the end of the day I'm just going to keep doing me. If you see me as a woman then ok. If you see me as a man then that's ok too. Now, please pass the mash potatoes ;-p